June 25, 2008

Old Obsessions

I’m building something for you; compiling my obsession when in reality you owe me nothing, not even the acceptance of a package, the return of a phone call or the reciprocation of my desire.
I search for your smoky smell in my clothes and pillows, you are already gone. Your face in the glow of the television was everything I needed and it has now become everything I long for. I imagined it would be your face when I woke up on this side of my universe but it wasn’t. You are not here and you’re barely there. I try to pick up, try to move on. Seduce me again, I beg you. Try to block it out, try to smile. Want me again, I beseech you.
I fell down on my knees in the gravel, arms stretched to the full moon as tears streamed down my face, body shaking. Maybe it was the tequila or the gin, but it feels much more real than those easy libations. I’m lost again; lost in loving/lusting you a million miles away as I, most likely, have barely crossed your mind.

“my only friends are pirates, it's just who i am

i'm better as a memory than as your man.”


Doug said...

Will you still right this way if you marry?

Doug said...

I meant "write." Perfidy!

Rio said...

I'd like to hope so, as this is one of my last private sanctuaries. but marriage is a far off bridge i have yet to come to much less cross.

Doug said...

I don't lose a lot of sleep worrying about it myself.

Cooper said...

I'm so glad you're still doing this Rio.